Wednesday, February 09, 2005

My Heart's the Bitter Buffalo

brusha brusha brusha
Originally uploaded by mtanner10.
Not feeling so hot today; seems like the beginning of the flu. Influenza. Sounds like a Spanish Subaru. In-flew-end-sa. I need to rest for the basketball game tonight. Carolina @ Duke. In a related story, Duke sucks scrotum. (not the most eloquent turn-of-phrase but I can live with it, especially in my weakened condition.)

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

I'm done with Sergio

At work, on my lunch. And I've gone from 7.85 hours of free time yesterday to being swamped, or nearly swamped. Maybe not swamped, perhaps just saturated. Hmm, that could be interpreted as worse than swamped. When I get home I'll thumb through my big-book-o-adjectives and get back to you on that.

If anyone is looking to get me a late xmas/early chanukah present, I really want a Nerf Turbo football. Remember those? I want the real deal, 1993 edition. And not the silly whistling one that came after it. These were the greatest footballs in neighborhood football history. Even the undermuscled kids could throw this squishy engineering marvel for great distances with minimal effort. The ball just loved to fly. Our 4 on 4 games were passing frenzies. I'm getting weepy just thinking about it.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Email to Andy Bader

Andy's weblog: Lost In My Pants; The Immaculate Ejaculates


I'm reading your weblog...from the beginning. And I must say, your IM conversations are quite funny because they are written exactly as you would say them in real life. It's also funny because I can hear your voice saying these things, but you never said them to me. Somehow, like some advanced NES entertainment system, my brain's creation engine is able to simulate the image and sound of you saying things that I've not witnessed.

Sure, I can imagine an invitation from Nikita Khrushchev to play croquet on the hardwood floors of my childhood home, but there is no accuracy to this vignette. Yet remembering your face and your voice...I can view what it would be like to have you win a spelling bee while simultaneously racing to paint a white picket fence. ("I'm getting more whitewash on me than South Carolina history!").

So, as I sit here marvelling at the magnificence of my own being, it's time to visit which stakes claim to being, by their continued pursuit of online excellence, the #1 croquet site on the Internet. It's a bold statement, and I'm going to verify it come hell or high hoops.