I usually don't undercut my own posting, but these bites from Overheard in New York are too good to miss:
A blind Black man with a Star of David is holding court.
Black man: The Pope is a faggot. They molested my kids. I want to go to church, but I can't because they molested my kids...now all White people are faggots.
Hispanic guy #1: How come they have kids?
Black man: Silence, you will wait until I have finished speaking...can't no one hit the ball like Hank Aaron. That's why we all in prison and they trying to kill us, but we will kill them. Can't nobody sing like Luther Vandross.
Hispanic guy #1: But--
Black man: Wait until I have finished...now the Hispanic people, like Dominicans and Cubans are also the true Jews, and the lost tribes of Israel...now you may address me.
Hispanic guy #2: What about Black Puerto Ricans, are they from the lost tribe?
Black man: I can't stand Black Puerto Ricans!
--West Farms bus stop, The Bronx
Yuppie: If we just let them kill the Jews we wouldn't have this problem. Then we could buy oil for $6 a barrel.
Hobo: Excuse me, sir? You dropped some change.
Man: What? Where?
Hobo: Bam! In my cup!
--4th Avenue & 7th Street
Little girl: ...but Mom!
Mom: Say it one more time, motherfucker!
--Pathmark, Cherry Street
Girl #1: So when I was in Italy, I went to France.
Girl #2: What did you do there?
Girl #1: I went to the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
Girl #2: Still Italy.
Girl #1: Really?
Girl #2: Yeah. So what did you do in France?
Girl #1: I guess I didn't go to France, then...
--Toys R Us, Times Square
Crazy guy: And what do gay people do with the money they save on child support? The parade! They pay for the parade.
--53rd Street station
Guy on cell: No, I'm waiting for the ferry...No, not him; the boat that goes into the city.
--Staten Island Ferry Terminal, Staten Island