Lunch in a Jiffy

My mistake. I opted to use my lunch break to get the oil changed in the Jetta. Jiffy Lube on 27 has been good to me in the past (last time was less than 20 minutes), so I hustled over there. Prompt check in, the car rolls over the pit, they start the process. The team leader comes in to upsell me the pine scent and armor all, which I politely decline, but I do spring for the tire rotation. This car has unnervingly expensive tires on it (18 inch, 40 series, Z rated) so the chance to save some life is worth the 15 bones. This is where the trouble begins.

Just after lifting the car and removing the wheels for the above mentioned rotation, one of the workers arrives with lunch. Say goodbye to returning to work on time. I watched helplessly through the glass as my car was left suspended in mid air without wheels. They ate, and ate some more, and I paced the waiting area. No use stressing over it. In the end, they finally finished their Taco Bell and attached my wheels, over an hour since I arrived. Bastards.

The waiting did give me occasion to witness a great intellectual conversation.
Employee: Lexus?
Customer: That's me.
Employee: You got like a hunnerd twenny thousand miles.
Customer: Yeah?
Employee: Yeah, you want the high mileage?
Customer: High mileage what?
Employee: High mileage oil for high mileage cars.
Customer: What's it do?
Employee: It helps high mileage cars. It's thick.
Customer: How much is it?
Employee: Forty one ninety-nine.
Customer: Is that more than the regular?
Employee: Regular is thirty (dollars) ninety-nine.
Customer: So it's only two dollars more?
Employee: (Rolls his eyes) Nah, bro. It's like seven or eight dollars more.

This happened, almost exactly like this. He was serious, too. Seven or eight...